FAQ: The Auburn Tigers


– Well, since we have Auburn scheduled for Saturday, I decided to do a FAQ, since JR has the notes covered… Now here’s my second team, the Auburn Tigers…

What is Auburn University?

Auburn University is a public college in Auburn, Alabama.  Auburn’s mascot is the tiger.  Their biggest rivalry is the Iron Bowl against Alabama.

They have tigers?

No, that is just their mascot, a fake, furry friend that attends football and basketball games.

Oh, So Mike Tyson owns Auburn?

What? Mike Tyson only owns that one tiger from the movie “The Hangover”, a fake story, he does not own a university.

Oh, So Mike Tyson owns the tiger?

No, the tiger is not real, he only owns the tiger in The Hangover…

The tiger is real, I saw it, I saw it in that one movie…

Ugh, can we please move on, I really don’t care about the tiger anymore, believe what you want.

Sweet, Well is Auburn good?

Yes, the Auburn Tigers have not lost in the 2010 season, mostly because of their star quarterback Cameron Newton.

Can I have my quarter back please?


Lol, So why do the “Auburn Tigers” have a rivalry with Alabama?

Maybe it is because they are both from the same state, and they are the two biggest universities in Alabama.

Is Sweet Home Alabama played often in this rivalry?

I really don’t know if they play Lynyrd Skynyrd or not.

Who is going to win Saturday?

I really don’t know, but probably Auburn…but maybe UK can win.

Oh, maybe they can drink some haterade during the game…

Are you on pills or something…You cannot focus…What is haterade?

Yes, I finally get to answer. First I am on pills, pills that make me look like Mike Tyson, want some?  Have you ever heard of BURR, he is my favorite.

I would rather not have illegal HGH.  Do the side effects of your HGH cause you to get cold or something? Do you need a blanket?

NO, that is not what BURR is…

Why do you keep saying that you’re cold?



Wait, What?



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