RD Special Report: Getting to Know the Cats Next Victim With FAQ Guy

The man of Transy.

– Well the UK basketball season kicks off tomorrow with an exhibition game against the feared Transylvania Pioneers. Why not get to know them a little better with none other than our renowned FAQ guy…

What is Transylvania?

Transylvania is a small liberal-arts college that plays D-III sports, and is one of the oldest universities in the country.

Wait, Central Romania has divisions in sports?

Wait, what are you talking about?  This is not the Transylvania in Europe.  Why would you think that I am talking about that Transylvania?

Well I mean they do have to compete with Dracula don’t they?  Their students must be scared out of their minds during the middle of the night.

No. No. Nooo. FAQ guy.  This is the Transylvania University located in Lexington, Kentucky.  They play the Kentucky Wildcats tomorrow in basketball.  Dracula has nothing to do with the University at all.  Before you ask your next stupid question… Dracula is not sucking the blood out of the students, nor are they sad that he will come and do that to them.

Wellll Exxxcccussee Me.  What are some famous people involved with this University that has nothing to do with Dracula somehow?

Well Thomas Jefferson is considered one of the most famous people related to the university.  He is considered the founder of the university.  Also, Cassius Clay is a graduate of the university.  Transy has produced such political figures such as mayors of Lexington, over 50 senators, Henry Clay, and multiple vice-presidents.  Above all though, an RD favorite Stephen F. Austin is a graduate.  He went on to found Tejas Texas.

Oh no way!  Muhammed Ali went there sweet!

Ugh no!  I have to specify everything when I get interviewed by you FAQ guy. EVERYTHING.  This is the abolitionist Cassius Clay (seen below).  He is directly related to helping slaves in the civil war, while he was not on the front lines such as another RD favorite, Harriet Tubman.

Well I gotta get outta here, so what are the specifics of the game tomorrow?

The game is at 7:00 p.m.  It is at Rupp Arena in downtown Lexvegas.  It should be a huge blowout, and Kentucky will probably win by at least 40.  It is the beginning of the best time of the year, which is college basketball.  We will be able to cover all of yo FAQS tomorrow homie, as we try to get back in the posting mood.  While you continue to ask me specifics, and I hate you for it, I appreciate your concern about the game tomorrow.  This one finally went smoothly for the first time in awhile FAQ guy.

Well shucks! Thanks! Could you repeat those specifics again though.. I was watching Dracula, who will attack students in the near future?

Specifics. Specifics.  I take back that last sentence.  I hate you all over again.  Ugh.


Will the real Cassius Clay please stand up?


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